Planet Quilting

Just recently I went to Moruya for a two day quilting workshop. We were given fantastic morning tea, lunch, afternoon tea and even champagne and chocolate. We were also shown some stretching exercises to do when sitting at a sewing machine and we were given massages if we wanted them. Oh…we did do some sewing too!

I really enjoyed the two days. I learnt a new technique for quilting, one I had heard about but never attempted myself. The end result was a tote bag that is nearly finished.

When I came home on Saturday afternoon I was happy but tired because I had to sit and focus for a long time on my project. At times I got anxious because I couldn’t understand the instructions or I made a mistake. I also became stressed because I didn’t have time to finish the bag.

You know what I learnt? I learnt that there is usually someone who will explain instructions to you and help you get around your mistakes. I also learnt it’s not the end of world if you don’t get something finished right then and there.

Sometimes when I’m trying really hard to get something perfect or I lose something I go into immediate panic stations, thinking the worst before it even happens.

I did that when at the end of the workshop I couldn’t find my  car keys. I immediately started thinking about how I will get home, who will come to pick me up and Dave will be so mad with me. Only minutes later I found the keys right where I had put them!

At times, especially when I’m unwell with anxiety and depression it’s not easy for me to “think straight” so now when I am well I practise how to do it. I stop, breathe, step back and slow my thoughts down. I think it will not be easy for me to do this when I am unwell but if I practise now when I am well I hope I can do it.

When I am unwell the need for things to be perfect overtakes my thinking. High levels of anxiety get such a strong grip on me I worry over the most trivial things.

I remember last time I was unwell being really, really anxious about having too many eggs. I stewed over it for days trying to come up with a solution. I became really stressed about eggs. I was thinking over and over why is no one eating eggs, what are we going to do with all these eggs? Who is going to cook with them? Why can’t anyone else see this problem? Why aren’t they doing something about it?

My psychologist even gave me an egg carton because she could see how stressed I was about this. Sounds ridiculous I know. When I look back on it now I think how on earth did I get so stressed out about eggs!

Now hopefully I am learning through practise how to deal with what I see is a problem. I stop, breathe, take a step back and think is this a problem I really need to worry about.

Ages ago I learnt this old Chinese saying (well I think it is Chinese). “Worry will not change anything.” I use this to try and tamp down my anxiety and turn my thinking around. It’s not easy when I am unwell but I now know I can do it. I’ve just got to practise the steps.

Back to quilting. It was such a full on two days in Moruya that I arrived back home feeling like I had been on another planet! A planet where everything stops except quilting! It was an unreal time which I thoroughly enjoyed. I hope I can do a similar workshop next year.