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If I am going to love and care for others then the first thing I need to consider is how I can love and care for myself. It should be first on my to do list and my primary point of focus. To do this I have to work on both my physical and mental well being.

In terms of physical health, there are things I need to continue to work on. Keeping up my weekly yoga class, adding some regular yoga practice at home and maintaining a regular walking routine. I’d also like to add some weight training to strengthen muscles I need for balance and bones.

To maintain my mental well being I will continue doing the things that give me pleasure. I also have to allow time for relaxation and meditation. Adding to this I must ensure I have regular consultations with my mental health team of GP, psychologist and psychiatrist. 

All of this adds up to respecting myself first, then I can respect others.

Smile and the world smiles with you. Do you recall this saying? I do and how true it is. Ever noticed how the popular people become popular because they’re always smiling.

My face is not a smiley face at all. Whenever I’m happy it’s not immediately apparent that I am. I have a downward crease from my mouth so that I always look sad. To overcome this I have to work hard to convey that I really am happy even if I don’t look like I am.

It’s hard work to be looking one way and be feeling just the opposite. I’m envious of those who always look happy even in the most trying of circumstances. Just because they show their teeth a lot or they look like they’re smiling all the time. Wish I looked like that.

To overcome this disadvantage I make sure I compliment all I meet and in so doing convey my contentment. How do you show your feelings to others? A smile, a hug a shared joke perhaps? It’s really important to convey to others your feelings and very important to fake how you feel especially when you really feel like giving life a kick up the backside or perhaps you have just experienced the straw that broke the camel’s back. Life is what you make of it. There is only one life and it is here and now in this present moment. Make the most of the life you have now. Remember you cannot change the past and you cannot predict the future.

Life is what you make of it. There is only one life and it is here and now in this present moment. Make the most of the life you have now. It’s impossible to change the past and it’s impossible to predict the future with one hundred percent accuracy so why not live in the present moment. Content with who you are and what you have.

I started photography and bird watching at about the same time. I remember the Eastern Spinebill I snapped at Gooloo Creek Wildflower Farm and an image of an unidentified plant later I found out it was a type of wild olive.

Not long after this, I stalked an Eastern Whipbird for at least half an hour. This morning  I heard the unmistakable call of Male and Female Whipbirds. The long drawn out whistle of the male followed by the crack of the female. On investigation, I was fortunate to see both male, female and a juvenile. Boy, was I excited they were out of the undergrowth and easily photographed.  I found my camera then tiptoed to a good vantage to snap this shy bird.

Patience is a virtue and it has its own rewards. How blessed am I that I can devote time to two things I enjoy immensely photography and birding.

Very happy with the result.

Sad memories are beneficial as long as they don’t prolong a feeling of regret, guilt or grief.

It is good to grieve. We all grieve in different ways. Some grieve for weeks, months or years. It becomes a problem when we hang on to grief as if our life depends on it. It becomes a problem when grief becomes our dominant feeling for extended periods of time.

Grief is not a negative emotion but it can be a problem if all we are doing is feeling upset at the loss of a loved one. I’m not an expert on grief. I can only write from my personal experience. Having had a close family member die several years ago and another just recently I can recall what my feelings were.

They were feelings of loss and devastation. Feelings of bitter regret. Feelings of comfort knowing the people in question no longer suffered pain. Feelings of regret about things I could have done. The all encompassing feeling is one of loss. Never being able to touch, listen and watch that person again brings out feelings of desperate longing. Hoping, praying that I will meet with that person again after death.

My grief is not the same as others. It is personal. It is about my relationships and my memories.

The Buddhists tell us we think with a Monkey Mind. In the simplest way, I will explain it like this.

Everyday all day from birth to death an infinite number of thoughts become part of our life. We can choose to make them part of our story.  Thoughts are the chattering Monkeys or the Monkey Mind. What we do with these thoughts is up to us. We can pay heed to some of these thoughts, we can dwell on some of these thoughts or we can acknowledge them and let them go.

It’s impossible to stop them. Death to my present knowledge is the only way we can stop the Monkeys. Having no experience of death I can not be certain that this will happen.

What we do with the chattering Monkeys becomes our feelings and our behaviour.

Buddhists will tell you that meditation or Mindfulness is how we can deal with the Monkeys. When we meditate the chattering Monkeys come unbidden into our mind. We can choose to give them life by focusing on them or we can ignore the Monkeys by coming back to the breath.

A state of prolonged enlightenment comes when we can acknowledge the monkeys but pay no attention to them. The way to enlightenment is how you respond to the Monkeys.

Think about it.

A few months ago I was not well. I was lethargic, disinterested and felt alone. Why? I was depressed. Again!

Depression appears to be one monkey I haven’t been able to get off my back entirely. She clings to me desperately hanging on by one hand. If only I could rid myself of her completely. Knowing that this extra load I will carry for the rest of my life is daunting. However, there is good news.

This time the monkey has turned into a Dragon and I’m happy to say, it’s almost invisible. It breathes fire only when I let it. Mostly though it breathes a lukewarm steam.

Having a conclusive diagnosis was not exactly what I wanted to hear, even though I knew it was an accurate appraisal of my behaviour.

I have been in denial for quite some years. Living under the misunderstanding that some mental health disorders are worse than others. Why has it been hard to accept? I don’t have a definitive answer. My thinking was no doubt a little flawed.

Any mental health disorder is of concern no matter what it is. My life is better when I’m balanced as opposed to having a Dragon riding shotgun on my back.

The Dragon has raised her ugly head but I’ve managed with the help of family, friends and professional medical practitioners to fend her off with a whopping big jousting stick called Mindfulness.

There is no denying, medication has had an impact too but without Mindfulness the bloody terrifying Dragon would still be burning the hairs on the back of my neck.

Right now the Dragon has backed off and I’m better prepared should it block my path again. Armed with Mindfulness I feel strong enough to piss the Dragon off should (and it will) come bearing down on me again. To all those facing Dragons, I’d like to say get out your Mindfulness Box of Tricks and Common Sense.

Some people poo, poo, FB as if it is some how malignant and dangerous. I think it’s how you use it that counts.

People use posts and comments to share enjoyment, congratulate, share opinions, to learn, advertise, garner support or simply to share some news with family and friends.

Others use social media to belittle, abuse, vent, anger, attack and oppose another’s opinion.
We’ve all done some or all of the above. I know I have.

It can at times be difficult to interpret the motive behind the words because the written word at face value can mean different things to different people. Hence, the liberal use of emoticons, exclamation marks, and abbreviations eg lol, (which I mistakenly thought meant little old ladies), until I became enlightened.

Trolls and trolling is a part of the 21st century media and will never be eliminated whilst you have people who want to see how much mischief they can stir up or how they can bait the unwary.

I think my biggest concern is the lies and deliberate deceptions that are becoming more frequent. Spin and doctoring of the facts is alive and well. While people have differing values it will never stop.

The other major concern I have is the increasing amount of very unsavoury posts that manage to infiltrate our pages via bloody annoying hackers. Who try to dump pornography onto our space or invade our posts with spam trying to sell Ray Ban sunglasses and the like.

A third concern is the manner in which the FB administrators don’t allow some posts, such as a breastfeeding woman or an indiginous woman’s breasts as part of culture but allow other posts which I find way more repugnant. I guess here again it’s a matter of personal values and public tolerance.

All media owners have at their fingertips the ability to control what is published and what stays out of the limelight. It is up to the readers to learn how to find out what is the truth and what is a lie.

The bottom line is don’t believe everything you read and hear is true. Young people particularly need to be given the opportunity to learn the difference. From political spin to photoshopped images everyone needs to regularly remind themselves that not everything they glean via the internet is true. Sometimes they are fiction. 😊

Compassion (noun) a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering.

Is compassion innate or do we learn it? The old nature or nurture dilemma. I believe we learn it. Why, because I have learnt compassion. I was not born with compassion. I was offered it and I accepted it. It is part of my spiritual journey.

Compassion is a value on which I base my life. It is a value attached to my heart, a feeling born of my spirit. Compassion is a value that connects the mind and body with the spirit. Compassion is a value I hold up as an example to others. Compassion is the hand and face of love.

Ignore compassion and you ignore love. Sweep compassion under the carpet and you ignore love. Choosing not to shine the light of compassion towards others you ignore love. Ego, greed, pride, lust is the reality of ignoring love.

I am troubled by current world leaders or those who wish to be leaders displaying a lack of compassion. Is it by ignorance. No! It is by choice. They have chosen themselves above all others and in their selfishness they have pushed compassion away.

What can I do about this? I can live my life based on the twin values of love and compassion. There but by the grace of God go I. I chose neither my place of birth nor my time of birth. What I can choose is how I can live my life as an example of compassion and love. Can you choose this too? Yes you can!

The following is a poem written by Stanley Miller Williams called Compassion.

 Compassion

Have compassion for everyone you meet.

even if they don’t want it. What seems conceit,

bad manners, or cynicism is always a sign

of things no ears have heard, no eyes have seen.

You do not know what wars are going on

down where the spirit meets the bone.

Here is a video clip of Lucinda Williams singing her father’s poem off the album Down Where the Spirit meets the Bone.

 

Some people poo, poo, Facebook as if it is malignant. I think it’s how you use it that counts. Some use posts and comments to share enjoyment, to congratulate, to share opinions, to learn something, to advertise, to garner support or simply to share some news with family and friends. Others use social media to belittle, abuse, vent, attack and oppose another’s opinion. We’ve all done some or all of the above. I know I have.

It can at times be difficult to interpret the motive behind the words. The written word at face value can mean different things to different people. Hence, the liberal use of emoticons, exclamation marks, and abbreviations eg lol, which I mistakenly once thought meant little old ladies, until I became enlightened. ☺

Trolls, people who abuse, stalk, harass, bully, threaten via comments or messages  are a part of 21st century media. and will never be eliminated whilst you have people who want to see how much mischief they can stir up or how they can bait the unwary.

I think my biggest concern is the lies and deliberate deceptions that are becoming more frequent. Spin and doctoring of the facts is alive and well. While people have differing values it will never stop.

The other major concern I have is the increasing amount of very unsavoury posts that manage to infiltrate our pages via bloody annoying hackers. Who try to dump pornography onto our space or invade our posts with spam trying to sell Ray Ban sunglasses and the like.

A third concern is the manner in which the FB administrators don’t allow some posts, such as a breastfeeding woman or an indigenous woman’s breasts as part of culture but allow other posts which I find way more repugnant. NRL footballers appear to be masters of this. I guess here again it’s a matter of personal values and public tolerance.

All media owners have at their fingertips the ability to control what is published and what stays out of the limelight. It is up to the readers to learn how to find out what is truth and what is a lie.

The bottom line is don’t believe everything you read and hear is fact. Young people particularly need to be given the opportunity to learn the difference. From political spin to photo shopped images everyone needs to regularly remind themselves that not everything they glean via the internet is true. Sometimes they are fictitious rather than factual.

Today’s epiphany. 😊

When someone is tired, cranky, at the end of their tether, give them two heaped handfuls of patience and an armful of love. If it’s yourself double the quantities!

Minutes spent in stillness and silence are more valuable than hours of busyness.

Housework will always be there. Family and friends may not.

I am grateful for my identity. I am content with who I am. I appreciate my similarities. I recognize my differences.

I could not choose where, when and to whom I was born but. I can choose how I respond to my circumstance.

I can choose love and compassion just as I would have others love and show compassion to me.

I can choose my values. I can model my values. I can nurture my values. I can stand up for my values. I can respect the values of others without agreeing to them. I am me.