Depression for me is like looking through a fog. There is light but I can’t always see it because what I see first is the fog. Getting through the fog, to see the light needs a trained eye so one can see from another perspective. I want to refute in this post some of the insidious lies that depression tells you. More importantly, I want to convince you of the truth.
Firstly depression will tell you that you are, weak. It will trick you into believing that you’re not medically ill … and if you’d just work harder at things, you’d feel better.
The Truth is: Depression is NOT a weakness. Depression is a very real illness that affects the behaviour of many people emotionally, socially, behaviorally and physically. You cannot will it away or readily snap out of it. Just get on with it and suck it up.
Secondly, your depression will tell you are damaged goods. Depression has a way of making you feel useless, hopeless and worthless. When you’re depressed, you believe that no one wants to hear about your sadness or troubles. You believe that no one values you. You are convinced that no one wants to be with a depressed person that you’re undeserving of attention, love, and tenderness from others. Depression will shred your self-esteem, shake your confidence and invalidate your sense of worth.
The truth is: Negative thinking is the linchpin responsible for generating low self-esteem. So, learning how to use positive self-talk is vital to combat depression. Psychotherapy is one way to retrain your mind-set. Treatments will help you ground yourself with realistic truths about who you are, it will map out your strengths and talents and allow you own your flaws and weaknesses. You can also own yourself. This means you accept yourself fully. Live life without regrets and you can learn to love yourself – as well as allowing others to love you – not in spite of your depression, but with acceptance of it.
Nothing Matters. Depression will cajole you into believing people and things no longer hold value for you. Dread and apathy reign supreme where happiness and meaningfulness once ruled. You become less and less connected to things in your life. Depression puts down your world until it becomes a space you don’t care about anymore. You give up, you don’t care, your values disappear.
The truth is: Depression creates this helplessness it takes away your control of aspects of your life. Without direction and a sense of purpose, you slowly become powerless. Again, therapy offers ways to offset these self-defeating thoughts. It takes practice and patience. It is not a quick fix. When you change your thoughts, you change your world.
I’m just too weary mentally to write anymore today. More about the lies and the truth of depression another time.
Meanwhile, enjoy the fantastic music of Eurythmics and the voice of Annie Lennox.
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